Kati’s hair pulling is a vicious cycle

Her journey has lacked support from everyone who should have been there

People of all ages can be cruel, and it takes a journey, truly, to realize that, especially ones with trich. When I was only in third grade, I started pulling out my beautiful, long, thick hair … for reasons I didn’t know, for reasons then I didn’t care to know … But children that young are so unforgiving … and it started to take it’s toll. And the more they asked me, the more I ripped from me … not just hair, whole emotions, tears.

Over the next two or three years, I was on a vicious cycle, picking horrendously for a few days, and then feeling so bad that I wouldn’t dare touch my scalp for the next, and then almost “rewarding” myself for not picking by picking … I felt horrible. But the summer after fifth grade, I managed to go free of the desire for the entirety of middle school … but that summer before I started high school, it was all for nothing…

I started again, with my fully re-grown set of beautiful, thick hair, from where I was almost completely bald before. My friends have never asked, but I can see the stares, the looks of … concern…on their faces. My teachers, too. Next year, I’ll be a sophomore, and continue to pull on my hair, and have a bald spot almost the diameter of a tennis ball on my scalp and across the back of my head.

It’s been hard because my parents have no clue about this … what it’s called; they just think I’m a freak for it, truly. My mom asks why all the time, and I really have no answer … and she’ll never research it, only threaten me with various things. It’s horrid, what she says to me. My dad, too. I know they’re concerned, but there’s only so much, telling me that I pick … how large the spot’s getting. They tell me like I don’t know. They don’t have to live with the people, the stares, the comments that are just barely out of hearing range … and I don’t have the courage to tell them, or anyone. I feel like I’m living with this alone. And hopefully, I can overcome that before it breaks me. I’ve been on no medication, but will begin trying out your low-glucose diet and see what works … you guys might really do wonders for lots of people… Thanks for being there when so many aren’t.

><>Kati<><

Recovery Expert

Recovery Expert

One pull or pick free coach, for the whole of your time with us. Minimum specialist trichotilllomania recovery ten years.

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Accounts of people with trichotillomania

The BFRB blogs and experiences described in this section may be disturbing so don’t read on unless you’re sure you are up to it.

how can I stop pulling my hair out

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