Privacy is an individual’s right, please respect that.  

Of course you need someone to confide in, but please have this be a trained professional.

“My mother’s cleaner asked me, do you still pull your hair out? and I nearly died of embarrassment”, Nadine, aged 15. 

Your child has the right to decide who should know about their BFRB or hair pulling disorder. If you’re asked not to talk about it, please keep it to yourself. You can find ways to discuss your feelings without giving away too much.

At the same time, we appreciate that talking about how you feel is positive. Children may have problems overcoming their shame and telling others about their Trichotillomania.

It’s perfectly natural to feel distressed and concerned about your children pulling, but it isn’t your fault. We’ve provided a safe environment for you to talk to others and get help, without outing your child who may not be ready to tell anyone.

The hurt that a parent feels for a child is a unique and intense kind of pain, special in every sense, and positive in many ways. Right now, for instance, that hurt is motivating you to seek out help. (((hug))). That’s terrific. So where do you allow your pain it’s space, and when do you release it, and let your child’s feelings become paramount? You’re doing well right now … and you might even hear your child say ‘it’s not about YOU, it’s about me’, but that’s ok; it’s about whole families, and living with something that’s not how we’d like it to be.